1. “Left hand, right hand, it doesn’t matter. I’m amphibious.” – Charles Shackleford
To be fair… He can actually breathe underwater too.
2. “Any time Detroit scores more than 100 points and holds the other team below 100 points, they almost always win.” – Doug Collins
… Almost? What happens the other times?
3. “I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father” –Greg Norman
And all of his other parents he failed to mention.
4. “Rich Folkers is throwing up in the bullpen.” –Jerry Coleman
He’s sick? I hope he can still pitch today.
5. “The drivers have one foot on the brake, one on the clutch, and one on the throttle.” –Bob Varsha
OK, just how many legs are required in this event?
6. “You can sum up this sport [boxing] in two words: ‘You never know.’” -Lou Duva
Only two? OK, counting problem here!
7. “When you get that nice celebration coming into the dugout and you’re getting your ass hammered by guys—there’s no better feeling than to have that done.” -Matt Stairs
Umm… what? I hope he lubed up before.
8. “The NFL, like life, is full of idiots.” –Randy Cross
9. “He’s a guy who gets up at six o’clock in the morning regardless of what time it is.” –Lou Deva… again.
E-for Ediot, period.
10. “You don’t like to see hookers going down on players like that.” –Murry Mexted
Ermmm....alright, i guess.
11. “I dunno. I never smoked any Astroturf.” –Tug Mcgraw
After being asked if he preferred grass or Astroturf, the Tugger responded with this gem.
12. “Baseball is 90% mental. The other half is physical.” –Yogi Berra
And just because Yogi gave us so many, a bonus: “If you come to a fork in the road, take it.”
A certified mental giant!
13. “We’re going to turn this team around 360 degrees.” –Jason Kidd
So, you’re going to turn it all the way around and continue in the direction it was originally going? On second thought, maybe you should stay in college Jason.
14. “He treats us like men. He lets us wear earrings.” –Torrin Polk
That’s the most important thing a college football coach can offer his team. Earrings.
15. Reporter: “Did you visit the Parthenon while in Greece?”
Shaquille O’Neill: “I can’t really remember the names of all the clubs we went to.”
Just goes to show what his priorities ah...
No comments:
Post a Comment